Sandwich Board Sign Guy breaks glass ceiling

"I couldn't be prouder of this Sandwich Board Sign Guy for coming out", Obama says. "I'm so impressed by his courage. Sandwich Board Sign Guy has opened the door for so many Americans, not just those who share a desire to discuss this topic, but those who want to wear it on a large sign in traffic like they lost a bet."

In other news, Rapid Realty employees are being offered a 15% raise if they get a company logo tattoo. "I made this offer while I was hammered drunk and regretted it the next day," stated the company owner. "Looks like I'm stuck with it now." Meanwhile, an employee who wants the raise but doesn't want to desecrate her body is wearing a sandwich Board sign with the company's logo. "It's tough to sit at my desk with the sign, but I'll sue if I don't get my raise," she said.