Why did Francis Bacon's Painting of 'Three Studies of Lucian Freud' sell for a whopping $142M, yet the portrait of Pope Francis with Bacon Vestment only went for $38 on eBay?

Chances are, somewhere on your favorite news feed today is the story of the art dealer, William Acquavella (Aqua Velva?), who just paid a record $142 Million for a portrait by Francis Bacon titled, 'Three Studies of Lucian Freud'.

Francis Bacon Painting Sets Record At Auction

But the reason you come to my Chattering Teeth blog is to get the rest of the story (or the google search miss-directs by pet owners wondering why their dog or cat's teeth chatter).

Either way, you're in luck! Chattering Teeth was on the scene with crack (smoking) reporter, Gullible Gabe, to interview the bid winner, and finely groomed William Aqua Velva.

WILLIAM: Remember the Edward Jones commercial where a man with the winning bid at an art auction immediately turns back to the auctioneer, saying, "I'd like to go ahead and sell it now."?

Well I know how he feels. What is this exactly? The Three Stooges of Freud? What a lovely use of browns, tans and baby poop diarrhea yellow. C'mon! I thought this auction was a classy joint. When I read the sandwich board out front that read "Francis Bacon Painting For Sale", I was convinced it was for that masterpiece on Ebay I missed out on this past summer of Pope Francis with Pancake And Bacon Vestments.

Now THAT is a work of art! What would you rather hang on your wall!?

In other news, contrary to the MSM, I am a Catholic AND a conservative, and I LOVE Pope Francis... and everything 'bacon' for that matter.