Yes, Virginia, Obama is Wrong

DEAR PRESIDENT:
I am 8 years old.
Some of my little friends say there is no First Amendment right of free speech anymore. Papa says, 'If you criticize The One and his socialist single-payer system, you will be flagged as "fishy" and reported to a snitch site. Please tell me the truth; is this still America?

VIRGINIA O'HANLON
115 WEST NINETY-FIFTH STREET



I don't want the folks who created the mess to do a lot of talking. I want them to get out of the way so we can clean up the mess. I don't mind cleaning up after them, but don't do a lot of talking."

Am I wrong Virginia?

VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong and they are currently being held and questioned by my new secret Civilian Security Force. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical Fox News and right wing. They do not believe what I say except what they see in the actual healthcare bill. They think that nothing like global warming can be which is not comprehensible by actual science. All minds besides mine, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little compared to my awesometudiness. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with my boundless glory.

Yes we can, VIRGINIA, this is still America, but it is now me. I exists as certainly as my love for power and control disguised as generosity exist, and you know my eloquent rhetorical flourish eminating from my teleprompter gives your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Lord and President, Barrack Hussein Obama. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. As if all the VIRGINIAS were secretly gathered up from their little beds in the dead of night and taken to a bad place for little girls who "do a lot of talking". Am I wrong Virginia?

Not believe in Obamacare! You might as well not believe in fairies Barney Frank! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys to catch my hired union thugs, but they will not see them coming down, so what would that prove? Nobody has actually read the entire healthcare bill, but that is no reason to question my benevolence. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Would you like to see fairies dancing on your lawn? Of course not, but if I get hit, I will punch back twice as hard, Virginia. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in my $Trillion dollar deficits.

You may tear apart my teleprompter and see what makes the words inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all who are protesting in Town Halls across this nation could tear apart. Only blind faith, fancy rhetoric, Reverend Jeremiah Wright's poetry, love of power, can push aside that curtain and view and picture my supernatural beauty and glory beyond. Am I real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else more real and abiding.

No Lord and savior, Barrack Hussein Obama! Thank Marx! I live, and my presidency will live past the current two-term limit and forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, my policies will continue to make miserable the heart of capitalist free-market dissenters.

Am I wrong Virginia?