Monday, June 2, 2014

Another Unexpected Resignation Rocks The Obama Administration, as Bo the First Family dog steps down

Bo, the Portuguese Water Dog called a press conference in the briefing room this morning to announce he "wanted to go outside", and that he was stepping down from his post as the nation's First dog.

He did not disclose his future plans, other than his immediate plans when he gave Biden the signal to grab the pooper scooper. While Bo wasn't very forthcoming as to the reasons for leaving, it is well documented that obama is a former dog eater which must add additional stress to a First Dog working for a Kenyan-born boss. 
Earlier this week Obama accepted the resignation of VA Sec. Eric Shinseki, followed closely by the surprise departure of White House Press Secretary Jay Carney, who is thought to be leaving to pursue a music career as lead tambourinist in his son's boy band.

Remember, it was just this past March when the White House lost its openly gay pastry chef due to Michelle's "demonic" menu demands. With Bo's departure, one has to question whether Michelle's strict menu restrictions are palatable to even a dog.

Speculation has been heating as to who will replace him. When the president was asked directly if he had a replacement in mind for his favorite departing dog, Obama promised to find a suitable replacement at the shelter. When asked the same question about Jay Carney's replacement, Obama stated, "I thought that's who we were talking about."

It appears to be a mass exodus of fleeing rats from a sinking obama canoe.  Some have even dared to think the unthinkable, that Obama himself may step down after the conclusion of his second term, though house money says he's not going anywhere.

One thing is for certain, this nation cannot go on for a prolonged period without a First Pet being named and filling this vacancy. In a recent poll question asking. "With Bo leaving the First Dog post, what breed would you like to see replace him?" The American public   overwhelmingly selected "a rabid Grizzly" as their first "write in" choice.

For all obama has done for us, I say we surprise him with it.

4 comments:

Sparky @ My Thoughts Exactly said...

I seem to remember the Hildabeast killing Slick Willy's dog. Maybe Bo is concerned about the First Bitch returning to the White House? I'm all for the Grizzly. Hope the dark meat laced with poo doesn't give him indigestion. ~:)

Jess said...

What a wonderful replacement. Make sure it's hungry, before delivery.

Ed Bonderenka said...

Some have even dared to think the unthinkable, that Obama himself may step down after the conclusion of his second term,
One can only hope.

DaBlade said...

Sparky, The closest second in the poll was a pit viper, but there are enough of those already in this administration :)

Jess, Hungry and really PO'd. And obama smothered in honey and rolled in grubs and berries.

Ed, You, sir, are one of the dreamers. Gonna take some gigantic tweezers to remove that painful sliver.