Thursday, July 24, 2008

My debate on the environment with the new Barbie

If you're like me, you've discovered that the new S&M Barbie is quite a good listener and doesn't complain about being kept in your dark glove compartment. If there is one thing Barbie and I agree on the most is that we should drill now. Barbie is concerned, however, with the environment. I explained to her that I cared about the environment, and in fact have blogged about my love for it. "We can drill for oil in an environmentally conscious way. The two are not mutually exclusive concepts," I argued. Barbie just stared at me then with that come-hither look of hers.

A must-see video I found thru Hot Air Stephen Colbert's interview with the Sierra Club's Carl Pope:
I loved the end when Colbert channeled the polar bear thru a sock puppet:
Colbert: On your website, you have endangered animal puppets for sale. I have one right here. This is a Polar Bear.
Pope: Polar Bear.
Colbert: Will you tell the polar bear why you want to protect it.
Pope: You have just as much right to enjoy your life as I do
Polar bear puppet (Colbert): I will feast on your flesh
Pope: I think the polar bear doesn't eat...
Colbert: Your children look delicious. I will crush their skulls with my massive jaws.
Pope: The last thing a polar bear needs is...
Colbert: Sleep lightly.
Pope: OK.
At the conclusion, Colbert calls out the hypocrisy of the tree-hugging wackos: "Mr. Pope, thank you for flying 2,580 miles and emitting 2 tons of carbon to come to talk to me today."

I can't disagree with Mr. Pope when he says the polar bear has as much of a right to life as he does. I just do not extrapolate these rights to the rest of humanity. I've said it before and I'll say it again. If an engine is developed that runs solely on polar bear blood, and polar bear blood can be pumped for 2 bucks a gallon - I'd say, "fill 'er up!"

Also, I thought the 3rd largest deposit of natural gas was Oprah, not Louisiana.

I like clean air and clean water just fine. The only way to keep our environment safe is through capitalism. Don't believe that, go visit China. Enjoy the algae sewage blooms and the 10 foot visibility in the Beijing.

I also like trees. But never as much alive as after they have been chopped down and made into a hockey stick. I believe the tree is happier too.

"Wouldn't you agree Barbie?"

[Blank stare]

4 comments:

Monkeydarts said...

You are so right. The happiest trees ever grown were the ones used for Gordie Howe's sticks and Al Kaline's bats.

Anonymous said...

How ironic is THIS ??? From the wires today..

(Sorry, missed the 1st time....)

DaBlade said...

Did you mean THIS?

Anonymous said...

YEAH !!! That's it..... OK, OK, so I'm rusty with my HTML codes.....
I'm workin on it..