Saturday, October 13, 2018

Broken News

The news is broken. I don't mean 'biased'. Of course it's biased, but hasn't this always been the case? No, what I mean by 'broken' is that when I can scanned the headlines on Drudge this morning as per usual, and I see this little diddy:

I immediately think of this

And why not? The day after Kanye West visits the Oval Office no less. In today's crazy world, I think it just as likely (maybe even more so) that pop singer Michael Bolton would be assigned to the weapons department on the deck of the guided missile destroyer USS Soul Provider (the young Michael Bolton, when he still had flowing locks blowing in the winds of change in the South China Sea - not the old, bald version. It's my nervous breakdown, so my prerogative - at least that's what skinny Elvis sometimes whispers to me).

Don't misunderstand. I LOVE that Kanye visited Trump's White House for no better reason than it has driver the left even more bonkers than they already were (and that is saying something). In fact, I think Trump should give Kanye a key and let him crash on the couch there for a while, since I read that Kim Kardashian is giving him the boot.

As for the broken news, I can't tell you how many times I am reading a story and thinking it is legit, then only to realize I was on The Onion or the Babylon Bee (or Chattering Teeth Blog)... and then thinking, "well, it could have happened that way..."

But why stress? I think I will put on this new album, relax and just Drift Away...

5 comments:

  1. I have that album! I think. Maybe not. I'm not sure what is real anymore.

    ReplyDelete
  2. YOU ARE HILARIOUS! I think John Bolton would love this post, too!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Kim and Kanye breaking up !? How am I going to sleep now tonight? Man, you gotta break this kind of stuff gently. The weekends are where I get my sleep !! The other five days, I'm digging through mud with my fingernails trying to find magic India rocks for the idiot god Kali.

    Wasn't Michael Bolton the Navy guy in Village People?

    But I agree, the news has been showering us with stories so weird, only Rod Serling could dream the stuff up. (Can I say 'stuff' here?)

    Well, here is one you may not have read yet. Crista blasa ford (yea that one) is now shacking up with bradley manning and bruce jenner in bradley's big lonely apartment. Crista calls them support animals. Apparently they are both down widdit.

    ReplyDelete
  4. This is gold, Jerry! I love it. More than I love Ovaltine :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ed, oh it's real! Embrace my truth.

    Z, Ha! I hope so. I wouldn't want him angry at me.

    Mr. Kid, I am truly sorry to be the one to bust that out to you. I assumed the National Enquirer was everyone's home page. And no, I don't think he was in the Village People... I think you are confusing his time in Menudo in his youth. Common mistake. Thanks for the Stormy Blasey Ford update... surprising the Enquirer hasn't picked that one up yet. Made me laugh!

    Cube, Good news! You don't have to choose between us. Enjoy that malt extract and sugary drink her, just beware of the risk of blowing it out your nostrils for effect.

    ReplyDelete