PIRATES IN THE NAIROBIAN is not exactly Jack Sparrow and the Black Pearl:
NAIROBI, Kenya – A U.S. destroyer on Thursday reached the waters where Somali pirates held the American captain of a hijacked cargo ship that was later retaken by the crew in an hours-long high seas drama.Not to worry pirates. Obama will soon arrive on the scene to begin negotiations and to listen to your concerns. I'm sure Obama would be happy to offer up some iPods to your crew after bowing repeatedly to your captain. If you'll allow, he will prostrate himself and swab yer decks. Just give him a bucket and a mop.
The pirates took Capt. Richard Phillips as a hostage as they escaped into a lifeboat Wednesday in the first such attack on American sailors in around 200 years...
"The pirates are in a very, very tight corner," Middleton said. "They've got only one guy, they've got nowhere to hide him, they've got no way to defend themselves effectively against the military who are on the way and they are hundreds of miles from Somalia."
This would never have happened under Ronald Reagan, one of the top five greatest president in our nation's history (squirm on it libs). The facts speak for themselves. Pirates never attacked us during the Reagan administration. In fact, Reagan exuded so much righteous strength that he solved the Iranian hostage crisis within minutes of his inauguration just by nailing the oath of office flawlessly and without a teleprompter. Iran immediately released the 52 U.S. diplomats they had held for the final 444 days of the Carter administration. (rhetardical mental note: Wasn't Mahmood Ahkmadeenadude, Ward Churchill, and Bill Ayers among the hundreds of radical student hostage takers?)