Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Will Obama order Jack Bauer to "Stand Down"?

'24,' Kiefer Sutherland Returning to Fox, Will Jack Bauer Soften with the Times?
Jack Bauer will be back to smash more terrorist cells, but will TV's toughest crime fighter still pull out all the stops to save innocent lives?

*Ring* *Ring* *Ring*

OBAMA: This better be good, you called me while I was in mid back swing and I'm under par.

JACK: Sorry Mister President. If it helps, you'll ALWAYS be under par to me. Anyways, I wanted to report a suspicious muslim person of interest at the Detroit Metro Airport who appears to have a pressure cooker in his backpack. May I shoot 'em in the thigh?

OBAMA: STAND DOWN Bauer!

JACK: But mister president...

OBAMA: There is no "there" there. Besides, we couldn't possibly get there, wherever "there" is, in time.
 
JACK: But I'm right here. Just give the order.

HILLARY: Ask him what difference at this point does it make!?

OBAMA: Mrs. Clinton says to ask you...

JACK: I HEARD HER! SIR, WE ARE RUNNING OUT OF TIME!... Wait... Hillary is golfing with you?

OBAMA: Not hardly Jack. She just carries my water jug. Joe is keeping score. Did I tell you I was under par?

JACK: Mister president, he is now boarding the plane. What would you like me to do about the terrorist?

OBAMA: Terrorist?... EXACTLY! I want you to find the domestic Tea Party individuals who must be responsible for radicalizing this poor youth. Investigate whether there has been another one of those disgusting videos of the prophet made.

Jack "Shoot 'em in the thigh!" Bauer may be back, but is he really needed these days? I mean, didn't the 'Bamster single handedly defeat terrorism by outlawing the use of that word?

3 comments:

Z said...

EXCELLENT, as ALWAYS!
You need to get in a newspaper or on the Weekly Standard or something!!!!

dr hirkimer said...

Dablade-I recently stumbled upon your world ranking:

Chatteringteeth.blogspot.com it is ranked #5,435,881 in the world, a low rank means that this website gets lots of visitors. This site is worth $1,654 USD.

I have 2 questions. First, aren't you concerned that the IRS has you in their sites? Your site is worth a fortune. Secondly, You know I love a bargain. Would you sell me the site for 75 bucks and Aunt Myrtle's meatball recipe?

DaBlade said...

Z - You flatter me as always! Thanks.
Dr H, The blog may be worth $1654 in Dollars, but how could I possibly put a price on my private thoughts, hopes and dreams? That said, I'll sell in a heart beat if when value eclipses $1750. And you gave me the recipe for free.