Ugh! The Wintry Mix family is bearing down on the Chattering Teeth Studios and Bunker and I assure you they were not invited. Watching weather.com's map in motion, I am reminded of a long family car ride in the family station wagon, and the Wintry Mix family barreling north from Texas for a surprise visit.
In the front seat and on the leading edge are the parents. They are made of snow. They are cold to each other, and they are hoping this trip north warms their relationship. The middle seat is filled with the older of the two children. He is a teenager with a bad complexion of sleet and ice. He thinks he's pretty slick but is really just a pile of mush. The kid brother, rain, has been banished to the back seat. He's noisy and cries a lot.
According to the local forecast...
EXPECT A WINTRY MIX TO DEVELOP LATE THIS AFTERNOON
...and none too soon for the parents.
RAIN: Are we there yet?
SNOW: Almost! Quit yer crying.
SLEET: MOM! RAIN IS TOUCHING ME!!
SNOW: Rain, keep your precipitation to yourself!
RAIN: I gotta pee!
SLEET: He's been peeing all over since Texas!
RAIN: I'm thirsty!
SNOW: Settle down, you had your fill back at the Gulf. We'll stop again at the Great Lakes, OK?
A WINTER STORM WARNING MEANS SIGNIFICANT AMOUNTS OF SNOW, SLEET AND ICE ARE EXPECTED. STRONG WINDS ARE ALSO POSSIBLE.
RAIN: MOM! SLEET farted!
SNOW: SLEET! Hold your wind until we get to Uncle DaBlade's house!
TOTAL SLEET ACCUMULATIONS UP TO OR IN EXCESS OF AN INCH AND ICE ACCUMULATIONS FROM FREEZING RAIN AROUND ONE QUARTER INCH. PRECIPITATION WILL BEGIN BETWEEN 2 PM AND 4 PM. IT WILL BEGIN AS A SNOW AND SLEET MIX THEN QUICKLY CHANGE OVER TO ALL SLEET. THE SLEET WILL BECOME MIXED WITH FREEZING RAIN AFTER 8 PM THIS EVENING. THE HEAVIEST PRECIPITATION IS EXPECTED BETWEEN 4 PM AND 2 AM. EASTERLY WINDS WILL INCREASE DURING THE AFTERNOON AND STRENGTHEN TO 15 TO 20 MPH WITH GUSTS OVER 30 MPH THIS EVENING. TEMPERATURES WILL SLOWLY WARM ABOVE FREEZING OVERNIGHT CHANGING PRECIPITATION OVER TO RAIN...
OK, fine. But you can't stay!
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