Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Wilson the volleyball leads in Dem polls

Did you hear that actor Tom Hanks just endorsed Barack Obama for president? He thinks "Wilson" should be his running mate. Ba-dum-bum!

If you ask me, the bloody volleyball should front that ticket. Hanks is a fine actor but there is no question he would lose to "Wilson" in a solo game of mental tetherball.

Hanks is just the latest celebrity to jump on his bandwagon. He joins Oprah Winfrey and Bruce Springsteen (along with racist reverend Jeremiah Wright and terrorist Bill Ayers). This is not a collection of mental giants, to say the least. I picture this group prancing down a yellow brick road towards Oz, a utopic society promised by the Wizard of "Hope" and "Change". A place where there is no George Bush; a place where the government takes care of everybody; a place where no one has guns and war is declared illegal and we all lived in peace eating tofu; a place where their guilt is assuaged; a place where none of the daughters are "burdened" with children... on and on ad-infinitum (and ad-naseum, and other French words that presently escape me).

Springstein would be the Scarecrow, loveable in his dimwitedness. Instead of Oprah singing "Over the Rainbow" as Dorothy, The Boss sings a different soundtrack themesong as they scamper down the golden bricks toward the Promised Land... "Cause tramps like us, baby we were born to run."

I'll cast the "good" reverend Wright as the Tin Man. Not a whole lot of heart for a supposed man of God. Bill Ayers is the perfect fit for the Cowardly Lion. If anything, "coward" is too nice to describe this POS. How he can walk around a free man stepping on Old Glory is beyond my me.

Hmmm. Let's see. Pelosi as the Wicked Witch. For Munchkins (think BIG HEAD ON LITTLE BODY popping up along the roadside) I have Ted Kennedy, Howard Dean, Al Gore, John Kerry, John Edwards, ahh heck... let's not leave out anybody - throw in the entire democrat side of the aisle. (I suddenly have an urge to play Wack-a-mole!)

This could be a multi-million dollar budgeted motion picture directed by Oliver Stone, and they could use every opportunity to bash Bush and the war on terror. Of course, virtually no one would pay to go see this thing, but that hasn't stopped Hollywood yet.

I guess that leaves an open role to cast for Toto. Any ideas out there?

4 comments:

  1. Tom joins an impressive list of Obama supporters including:Osama Bin Laden,Al-Qaeda,Hamus,PLO,Louis Farrakhan,Hugo Chavez,Ahadinejad of Iran,Fidel Castro,90% of the U.S prison population,100% of the U.S illegal aliens, 90% of the U.S media,100% of the worlds dictators,and oh,oh,oh I almost forgot... Michael Moore!!

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  2. You forgot 1 key component...
    (but I suppose this could fall under "ad-infinitum")

    I even went to the Joan Baez website and downloaded the lyrics.
    ~sniff~

    Kumbaya, my Lord, Kumbaya,
    Kumbaya, my Lord, Kumbaya,
    Kumbaya, my Lord, Kumbaya,
    oh, Lord, Kumbaya.
    Someone`s singing, Lord, Kumbaya,
    someone`s singing, Lord, Kumbaja.
    Someone`s singing, Lord, Kumbaya,
    oh Lord, Kumbaya.
    Someone`s praying, Lord, Kumbaya,
    Someone`s praying, Lord, Kumbaya.
    Someone`s praying, Lord, Kumbaya,
    oh Lord, Kumbaya.
    Someone`s crying, Lord, Kumbaya,
    someone`s crying, Lord, Kumbaya.
    Someone`s crying, Lord, Kumbaya,
    oh, Lord, Kumbaya.
    Someone`s sleeping Lord, Kumbaya,
    someone`s sleeping, Lord, Kumbaya.
    Someone`s sleeping, Lord, Kumbaya,
    oh, Lord, Kumbaya.

    (Joan Baez)

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  3. You went to the Joan Baez website? What lengths chatteringteeth readers will go to for the good of the cause! God bless you sir or madame.

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  4. I believe she is available (even at the ripe age of 67) for weddings, bar-mitzvahs, love-ins, and peace rallys....

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