Sunday, March 27, 2016

Easter Basket Toy Fails 2016

HAPPY EASTER! HE HAS RISEN!!

Hey, kids... What's in YOUR Easter Basket?  Here are my top picks for this year's "Worst Easter Basket Toys Likely to Make Your Child Cry" award.

1. In the, "It sounded better in the board room than how it turned out on the factory floor" department - What do you get when you cross a Chattering Teeth Wind-up toy with the Easter Bunny Rabbit?

Apparently, a Chattering men's Restroom Urinal Toy? Talk about having a potty mouth!
Looking for the bunny trail, our funny rabbit chomps his teeth and hops on his big white feet!  The pink nose bunny teeth is a silly addition to your Easter fun.  Just wind up his big front teeth and his chompers go into crazy action as he hops around on his toes.
I think I know the reason why Peter is hopping around on his toes! And don't step in that bunny trail...

or how about...

2. Blue Bunny Rabbit Easter Walks Wind-up toy
This cute bunny is in great used condition. He was never played with. He does work. From smoke free home. Please see my other windup toys on eBay too.

Never been played with? Now there's a shocker. And I'm sorry, if I'm going to buy a used toy on eBay for my child to put the small parts in their mouth, the least you could do is have the common courtesy of coating it in yellowed nicotine.

And the winner for this year's Creepiest Easter Basket toy goes to...

3. Baby Boy Barry Wind Up Cute Crawler
The cutest baby wind up ever! Baby Barry wiggles his diaper as he crawls across the floor. His head is posable for those adorable baby photos. What a great baby shower gift! Collect all three baby wind-ups for fun baby races!
Throw in an extra $50 bucks and Baby Boy Barry will repeat anti-American, cop-hating, race-baiting,  anti-Christian and Jewish slanders, and pro-moozlim and communist propaganda phrases!

Whew! I believe that baby is carrying a full load. Time for more hope and diaper change!

And last but not least, an old time Chattering Teeth best-selling original!

4. OBAMA THUMB PUPPET

Wooden Obama thumb puppet toy with red wood base - VINTAGE Old-time toy! Push up on the bottom of his base, he will wiggle, jiggle, and dance! Hold the button in and he will immediately collapse in a full blown treasonous bow; release and he "snaps" back upright! (Japanese Emporers and Saudi kings are not included) Fun toy for all liberals. 4 inches tall. VERY Small parts. Not recommended for adults with intellects over three years of age.  Made in China.


5 comments:

Ed Bonderenka said...

He is risen indeed.
As for the toys?....Bury them :)

Kid said...

Funny!
I like the baby barry. Would be fun to have at the shooting range.

DaBlade said...

well its after 730pm on Easter night. He Is Risen, and I just rose from the couch having just recovered from a sugar coma. wow forgot the potency of that stuff. I wonder if there is any peach cobbler and vanilla ice cream left?

cube said...

When I think I'm warped, I come here and know there are others who are way more warped than I am.

DaBlade said...

Awwww, thx cube. What a horrible nice thing to say :)