In an attempt to shrug off his expected poor showing in today's Hawkeye Cauci, Republican Presidential hopeful Jon Huntsman was quoted last week as saying, "They pick corn in Iowa."
Armed with a disposable cell phone and an Iowa phone directory, I decided to put his allegations to the test.
Shock Mock Poll Results:
When Iowans were given a choice between A random generic ear of corn or Jon Huntsman, they "picked corn" 5 to 1. Huntsman was also outpaced by write-in candidates, an arrogant carrot and punch-drunk bunch of grapes.
In a retraction attempt, Huntsman tries a final appeal to Iowans:
"Corn is the fruit of the sea... err, I mean vegetable of the fields. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, saute it. Dey's uh, corn muffins, corn bread, corn-kabobs, corn creole, corn gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried creamed corn. There's corn casserole, corn salad, corn holios, pepper corn, corn soup, corn stew, corn and potatoes, corn pancakes, corn mash. That- that's about it."
Jupiter Is the Last Place I'd Want to Go - At least not without a flotation device.
1 hour ago