Friday, January 27, 2012

My Daily Haiku with my Barbie collection

I call this one...
"Lather rinse and repeat":

Life is rock and roll
Sisyphus Vesuvius
Pyroclastic flow


If you're like me, you are a middle-aged male who likes to discuss politics and pop culture with his collection of Barbies. They all come from a diverse background of varying plastic-based vinyl molds, so it's usually a lively debate. As I tell them repeatedly, it doesn't matter the size of your colorful wardrobe or the value of your accessories, especially when you're at the bottom of a pitch black sock drawer.

So I lined them up on the window sill this morning and read them my Haiku.

At first, they just sat there in stunned silence, staring back at me through souless, painted eyes.

Pictured (left to right): My 1959 original Barbie, S&M Barbie, Earring Magic Ken and my tattoed-up Tokidoki

I take another pull from my brown bag as I wait, and the silence is finally broken.

Ken: I think it means that life is awesome. You know... sex, drugs and high-energy rock and roll!

Tokidoki: Since Haikus are Japanese poetry and I am the only Japanese inspired doll, I think I am the most qualified here to do the interpretation.

Ken: OK. And?

Tokidoki: (pause) I got syphlis once from a tat needle.

S&M Barbie: He said "Sisyphus", not "syphlis" ho.

1959 original Barbie: If I remember my Greek Mythology correctly, Sisyphus was a king who ticked off the gods, so his punishment involved having to roll a large boulder up a hill only to watch it roll back down, and to repeat this throughout eternity.

Ken: I didn't study Geek Monopoly, but I would think being named Sisyphus was punishment enough. At least he wasn't forced to listen to Miley Cyris' "The Climb" in a continuous loop on his iPod. Not even the gods could be that cruel.

S&M Barbie: Hey! I like that song!

Ken: Try Boston's "Satisfied" instead. (starts to sing) "You gotta have a little rock 'n' roll music to get you through the stormy weather... cuz Win or lose, it's alright... nothin's gonna help you more than rock and roll."

1959 original Barbie: Be quiet and learn something. In 1942, a gentleman by the name of Albert Camus had a philosophical essay published titled, "The Myth of Sisyphus." In it, Camus argues that Sisyphus symbolizes "man's futile search for meaning" and concludes with this: "The struggle enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy."

Tokidoki: So basically Hannah Montana had it about right. It is the climb.

Ken: Talk about a "man's futile search". At least Sisyphus wasn't unemployed in the Obama economy. Maybe that's where the volcano in the Haiku comes in.

I hear a car pull into the driveway. "Back in the sock drawer people!"


  1. I refuse to believe you have a Barbie. I simply refuse.

    (I had that first one!)

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