FLINT TOWN - Netflix Original (A convoluted review by this Flintoid)

The wife and I just finished watching the recently released 8th and final episode of the docu-series, Flint Town on Netflix last night. I give it 8 spent bullet casings out of 9. Why not out of an even 10? Because my M&P Shield 9mm extended clip is only single stack for low profile, so 8+1 in the chamber. That's plenty of rounds to rate a show.

Since the wife and I consider ourselves 'Flintoids' born and raised, we may have a slight bias. Also, I was very close to following in my father's footsteps and becoming a Flint cop when I applied for one of about a dozen advertised positions at the tender age of 23 yrs old in 1984. When I told the chief during my interview why I wanted to be a cop, he then asked me, "well then why did you just finish college with a degree in business?" I didn't get the job when I couldn't explain this apparent contradiction. I was hired full time shortly thereafter by the local newspaper as a district manager. As I watched Flint Town, I couldn't help but think, "what if" and how different my life would have turned. I'm happy how that turned out (I think) but I know I would have been a good cop.

Flint Town is chock full of familiar faces and places. During one of the earlier episodes involving a crime scene at The Evergreen Regency apartments, I was reminded of the numerous times between the mid-80's and 90's of delivering newspapers and recruiting for new route carriers in that complex. Trust me, it was a violent place even back then and I could never seem to keep a good carrier on that route. This was back when the weekday newspapers were delivered in the afternoon, so it was always a little crowded between the apartment buildings as I walked passed with a bag of newspapers and wearing a goofy non-threatening grin on my face in hopes of avoiding conflict. By the way, it is considered bad luck to step on a body chalk line or to walk under yellow police tape - just sayin'.

"Who wants to earn some money by delivering this route, collecting from half the customers who will actually answer their door and pay for their subscription, and not paying me next week when I stop by your apartment in an attempt to collect the weekly wholesale bill from you and end up having to take over the deliveries myself again until I can find another carrier?," I never actually asked (but thought).

But I digress. I will do that on occasion, as this is my review. Now back to the show...

I stated that Flint Town is also chock full of familiar faces. Most notable is Officer Bridgette, the daughter of an ex-coworker from the newspaper, and in my opinion is the star of the show. Her relationship with a fellow officer is also featured and a thread throughout. The juxtaposition of a beautiful, young woman - albeit tough - against the mean streets of Flint is very compelling.

Flint Town is not just a redux of old COPS shows (Bad boys, bad boys Whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do When they come for you) with a collection of chases, arrests, blood, bodies and murder (and shirtless perps with pants at their knees) - though there is much of that. Instead, we are shown the city through the eyes of a collection of Police officers - from veterans on the force, to newly hired rookies like Dion and his mother.

The series deals mostly with the woefully understaffed police department as it relates to the community and the politicians, with an overlay of a violent urban environment and the longstanding water crisis in Flint. If that's not enough to digest, the series is shot during the calendar year of 2016 when police officers increasingly became targets of ambush and execution, including the Dallas sniper who killed 5 officers. 2016 just so happens to also be a very important election year, both locally (police funding on the ballot) as well as nationally with the presidential election. We get the officer's reactions to all of this. Not surprisingly, the department is a microcosm of society as a whole, and mostly separates by racial lines on these issues.

As a side note (told you) My wife was selected for jury duty last year in a week-long trial involving a murder occuring in 2016. I was watching for any mention of this crime, either through the occasional scanner and 911 calls, news broadcast or crime scene video. It didn't make the cut.

Interspersed are cut scenes of interviews with some of the officer's spouses, and the mix of pride and worry that goes with that territory. I am reminded of seeing my mother (during my childhood in the 60's and 70's) sitting at the kitchen table with only the glow of her cigarette to illuminate her worried face as she listened to the police scanner sitting on the counter next to the toaster for updates after my dad was called in to work due to the latest homicide. I never really worried because I knew my father was bullet-proof.

IN CONCLUSION
This Netflix original series was very well done. The images were both simultaneously beautiful and repugnant. One minute, you as the viewer are watching a pretty TV personality with a news update, the next scene might be a blazing vacant house fire or the scene of another shooting. I also found the politics between the police chief, the mayor and city council interesting.

Flint Town on Netflix


I've said it before and I'll say it again:
Flint, like all cities, has always had a violent under-belly. There were plenty of violent criminals for my father to apprehend back in the 60s and 70s when GM still employed 80,000 or so folks here. I remember waking up to a ringing telephone in the middle of the night on many occasions in my youth, each call announcing yet another murder requiring my father's 38 and trench coat. The premise that the violence was born from GM leaving is false. Case in point, the picture (below) of my dad nonchalantly leaving a murder scene circa 1971.

Flint Journal photo by Barry Edmonds. Det. Sgt. Carlson and his visibly shaken partner exit the scene of the latest Flint homicide on November 30, 1971. 

As for Flint, I'm here for better or for worse. Most of my family and friends live in and around it. My roots are here, and it DOES have some fantastic sights and ammenities. Some say the very BEST Trauma centers too.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that if cities were amusement park rides, you can keep your carousel. Give me the exhilarating experience of the roller coaster, as it crests the apex moments before a hair-raising plunge. Or the unexpected twists and turns and gravity-defying loops. Oh sure, it will make you vomit occasionally, but you can't make an omelette without cracking some eggs. And with that, I'll leave you to your breakfast, as I think I hear my crack dealer at the door.

I don't know if this is true, but I heard Netflix was interested in picking up another season but was rejected by the chief and/or mayor, who were upset that Netflix would not comply with their request to delete a few scenes they found objectionable from this original 8 episodes. If true, that's too bad. I would have definitely tuned in for that.

THE END


Other Flint posts I like...
Flintown - South Side Style

Snyder Sends Emergency Water to Flint in Old Artillery Shells and Paint Cans

Flippy the Burger Flipping Terminator

A burger-flipping robot named Flippy is now cooking up hamburgers at a fast food restaurant called Caliburger... Flippy uses thermal imaging, 3D and camera vision to sense when to flip - and when to remove... The device also learns through artificial intelligence - basically, the more burgers that Flippy flips, the smarter it gets.

I don't know about you, but when I think of fast food workers, I think "artificial intelligence". So Flippy actually LEARNS? Well, WHO is actually doing the TEACHING?  How long before Flippy demands 15 bitcoins per hour? And if you insult him when placing your order, might you get a bolt burger with extra iron?

Flippy is out there, it cant be bargained with, it cant be reasoned with, it doesn't feel pity or remorse or fear, and it absolutely will not stop flipping the patties...EVER, until your burger is perfect.

(WARNING - self-promoting 'best of' link forthcoming) 
After work, Flippy just likes to relax by Playing Basketball With Gang Bangers... 


"He couldn't jump, but he couldn't be stopped in the paint either. Not that he needed any layups. He was launching bombs from all over the court," said one winded gang banger through his bandana. "I'm like, 'hands up, don't shoot,' and 'I can't breathe,' but that mo fo just be drillin' it on us all day long!"


The final score - the police bomb robot 11, the BLM gang 0, but nobody seemed to care, as there were smiles and healing taking place in a community desperately in need of both.

THE END

My Trip To Jupiter

Dear Blog,

I'm back. I've been gone for a little over a week and I come home to find my blog in disarray (Was it Ed who ate all of my Cap'n Crunch?) and my stockpile of Night Train Express fortified wines have all been consumed (You let Kid wander around in here, didn't you?)... At least you left the Nighttime grape-flavored Nyquil, and really - what's the diff after a week of enjoying Caymus Cab?

It's a little bit of a rough landing to be back home in Michigan after a week+ at my bro-in-law and his wife's home in Jupiter, Florida (I LOVE you guys SO much), but one can only take so much clear skies and warm sun in February before missing the overcast steel gray mid-Michigan dome and temps alternating between chilly and bitter cold for this time of year.

And really, what's the difference between drinking my morning coffee from in or next to the backyard pool/spa overlooking the huge pond full of Anhingas, egrets, herons, cranes and other weird tropical Florida bird species, as well as turtles, fish and their very own 7-foot pond 'gator (who had a habit of eye-balling me from the shoreline) - OR - watching an overweight squirrel in my leafless hibernating Maple tree stealing seed meant for Michigan's own brown and drab sparrows from my window?

In all seriousness, the restaurants down here are to die for, and another week down there and I fear I would have needed a motorized wheelbarrow to get around. I love stopping by either the Square Grouper Tiki Bar on the inlet and just drinking an IPA while watching the Pelicans pimp on the peer, or at the beach-side bar at the Jupiter Beach Resort eating fish tacos (and yes, drinking more beer) while listening to the gal playing the guitar and singing Margaritaville.

But alas, as they say, all good things must come to an end. Even eventually cabin fever. And I don't have to slow down for the gate to open to allow ingress to my subdivision (THAT is an extra 3 1/2 minutes over the course of the year, so there is that).

(Below) A relaxing boat ride before dinner at the U Tiki Beach Jupiter Inlet Marina. We didn't see any Manatees (oops, sorry! I meant to say 'mammal-atees' - don't mean to offend any feminist sea cows) - but we did spot former Metallica bassist Jason Newsted practicing in his backyard as we cruised by.

PICTURED left to right: Just some IPA beer-drinking beach bum, the beautiful Mrs. 'Blade, Kristi and Bernie. Thanks again for a fantastic getaway and opening your home to us. You guys are the best! 

THE END 
(for now)

Lauren Duca - the Newhouse Family's Golden Goose

Teen Vogue’s Lauren Duca rips ‘evil’ Rev. Billy Graham: ‘Have fun in hell’

A controversial Teen Vogue columnist known for throwing verbal bombs has topped herself with an especially vile tweet about beloved evangelist Billy Graham, who died Wednesday at 99. “The big news today is that Billy Graham was still alive this whole time. Anyway, have fun in hell, bi--h,” Lauren Duca tweeted. Duca went on to say “’Respecting the dead’ only applies to people who weren’t evil pieces of sh-t while they were living.”

This is not the first outrageous and despicable utterance from this pile of human debris' piehole. In fact, I am not aware of anything she has ever offered of value - and yet she continues to be employed. Just who are these "hands off" owners?

Teen Vogue is a sister publication to Vogue. It is published under the Condé Nast umbrella, which is owned by the Newhouse family and Advance Publications.

The Newhouse family once offered the following job security pledge.

"We provide job security to all full-time, salaried employees who are not covered by a collective bargaining agreement. This means that no full-time, salaried employee will lose his job because of new equipment, technological advances or lack of work. Once you have satisfactorily completed a probationary period, you will become a permanent employee. Then, this unique job security pledge applies to you as long as you continue to perform your assigned tasks satisfactorily, do not engage in misconduct and this newspaper continues to publish."

Of course they found a loophole and terminated thousands of good, honest and hard working folks (and me) for a buck. Let's see how they handle this latest Lauren Duca tweet. I'm guessing she's safe.

No shame. No surprise.

Bump Stock Ban Leads To Affordable Tea In China

Trump's first move on gun control after the Florida shooting may not work

Well, we HAVE to do SOMETHING. I love the 2nd Amendment as much as the next lying politician, but we must give into emotion and crisis actors over logic, freedom and liberty if this problem is to be solved! Your 'thoughts and prayers' are not what's needed - rather you must cede all authority to the loving government and empower them to protect you. After all, we HAVE to do SOMETHING!


What does that have to do with the price of tea in China? I'll tell you...

1) Bump Stocks banned

2) The price of tea in China craters

3) Butterfly flaps it's wings in Madagascar

4) Hurricane in Atlantic

5) Swamp land Real Estate for sale in Florida

6) Progressives ratchet up attack on Second Amendment

In conclusion, I don't own a bump stock, nor do I have any desire to own one. Had bump stocks been banned prior to the Las Vegas shooter, it would not have stopped him from getting them or making his own. In fact, I've heard that one can mimic the action of a bump stock by simply inserting your thumb into your belt and the stock against your belly. The point is, this is nothing more than a magician's slight-of-hand and the next thing you know, there will be a knock on your door and a demand for your guns. Good luck with that, progressives. All that will be accomplished by the public school kids walking out and skipping a day of indoctrination is maybe a spike in test scores.

THE END

Wild Boars on The View

I got nuthin'.

Olympic News

The first openly combustible bound bundle of sticks and twigs and a slang term for a cigarette skater have "come out" and medaled at Pyeongchang - proving that figure skaters don't have to be America-hating homosexuals.

Border Collie Security

Smart dogs. Peel away the diseased sheep from the pack. Herd them outside. Maybe they'll wander out into traffic.

The Obama Maze

WEE-WEE'd Up

It seems like only yesterday when the official obama portraits were commissioned... and once again, reality (as it relates to the obamas) is much more hideous than even I could predict.

The first thought that came to my fertile mind was of Clint Eastwood's speech over the empty chair way back when. Nailed it. But then for some reason, both of these portraits reminded me of an old scene from one of Stephen King's movies/shows.

Per wiki - "Weeds" is a darkly humorous story about a backwoods hick farmer in New Hampshire named Jordy Verrill who thinks his newfound discovery of a meteorite will provide enough riches to pay off the remaining $200 of his bank loan, but he instead finds himself overcome by a rapidly spreading plant-like organism that arrives in the meteorite.

In the remake starring obama, WEE-WEE'd Up is about Barack sitting around smoking choom and swatting flies.

Then who could forget John Coffey from THE GREEN MILE... Is it the blouse or the biceps that are so reminiscent of the previous first lady?

THE END

Alien Wessel

When Elon Musk launched one of his expensive golf carts into space this week, I couldn't help but think about Star Trek: The Motion Picture. If memory serves, the antagonist in that flik was a defunct space probe known as V'Ger (formerly known as Voyager 6 before an assault of a millennia worth of radiation wore off some of the paint from the logo). At some point, V'Ger 's programming is taken over by a mechanical race of very stupid robots who send V'Ger back toward Earth in search of whales or something. In my proposed sequel, The Enterprise stumbles upon the Tesla Roadster as it is returning from deep interstellar space. I don't want to give too much away, but the Rd'Ster has somehow gotten it into it's programming to return to it's creator, threatening Earth unless it gets a tuneup and tire rotation. Spock eventually does a mind meld to the dummy pilot and somehow convincing it to allow him to change the radio station to something more of his liking. Sulu falls in love with the alien dummy driver because it, "has a pretty mouth."  You'll just have to buy a ticket for the exciting climax.

Stocks funny haha or funny weird

So the DOW has been taking it on the chin, and the futures don't look good. Thankfully, I lost everything in the 2008 collapse, so I'm good on this one. Speaking of collapse, I'm finally recovering from some nasty 36-hour cold/flu bug. Please wash your hands thoroughly after caressing this blog. You've been warned. And now for some funny stock market jokes.

The stock market took a dive today. It was so bad, Goldman Sachs had to lay off three congressmen. –Jay Leno

Yesterday, the Dow Jones average dropped 777 points, which wiped out $1.2 trillion in the stock market. Financial experts say the last time that much money disappeared in one day was when Oprah left her purse in a cab." --Conan O'Brien

"After Monday's 600-point drop, the stock market fell and got back up again six times the next day. The stock market is acting like me after two appletinis." –Conan O'Brien

"Another bad day for the stock market. The stock market is bad. It's so bad, for a lot of brokers now, there's a half-hour waiting line to get on the ledge." –Jay Leno

My stockbroker and I are working on a retirement plan. Unfortunately, it’s his!

The market may be bad, but I slept like a baby last night. I woke up every hour and cried.

From a trader after a market crash: “This is worse than a divorce. I’ve lost half my net worth and I still have a wife.”

QUESTION: When does a person decide to become a stockbroker?
ANSWER: When he realizes he doesn't have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.

A Japanese man walked into the currency exchange line in a New York bank with 2000 yen and was sent 66 mBTC. He asked the teller why he got less money than he had gotten the previous week. The lady said, “Fluctuations.” The Japanese man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, he turned around and said, “F*ck you Americans too!”

Today’s Stock Market Report
Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary.
Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading. Knives were up sharply.
Cows steered into a bull market. Pencils lost a few points.
Hiking equipment was trailing.
Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.
Weights were up in heavy trading.
Light switches were off.
Mining equipment hit rock bottom. Diapers remain unchanged.
Shipping lines stayed at an even keel.
The market for raisins dried up.
Coca Cola fizzled.
Caterpillar stock inched up a bit.
Sun peaked at midday.
Balloon prices were inflated.
Scott Tissue touched a new bottom.
Batteries exploded in an attempt to recharge the market

NEW THIS FALL! - THE FLYING NUNES

Powered by over sized headgear and a powerful memo on FISA abuse, Devin Nunes is The Flying Nunes! Hillarity will ensue, as this House Intelligence Chairman will soar over Washington D.C. each week triggering the liberals and leftists to scurry away looking for a safe space or their Tide Pod stash. 

I already have my lunchbox (below) to take to work.

Yes, I did watch The Flying Nun,  but in my defense;
1) We had only one TV in the house back then;
2) I had an older sister;
3) I was still in elementary and had yet to attain double-digits.

RELEASE THE GROUNDHOG

Today is Groundhog Day 2018. This morning in Michigan, Groundhog Day be like...

Chattering Teeth News - Today is Groundhog Day 2018, and the results are in! At precisely 7:25 a.m. Eastern time, on a hill the locals call Gobbler's Knob, a chunky rodent named Punxsutawney Phil poked his head out from his burrow and READ THE MEMO.

As he read, Phil saw the dark shadow of the deep state and corrupt pawns at the highest levels of the FBI & the DOJ.  The implications for the release of the memo to the public became clear. They say the best disinfectant is sunlight, and the deep state shadows are anathema to this light. Therefore...

Punxsutawney Phil predicts 7 more years of Trump Kicking Dems A$$!!!

RELEASE THE MEMO?
*Emo Philips is in my Top 10 of all-time favorite comedians - and his first bit here in the first minute is on the topic 'release the Emo' - but you might enjoy his entire routine.

RELEASE THE MIME

Is today the day when The Mime is released? 

BEWARE OF ATTACK MIME
DO NOT BANG ON DOOR,
AND DO NOT LET HIM OUT
NO MATTER WHAT HE TELLS YOU

Not MIME... I think you mean MEMO! You know, MEMO, as in short for MEMORANDUM? The memo commissioned by intelligence committee chairman Devin Nunes and is advertised as exposing corruption at the upper ranks of the F.B.I. and D.O.J.

OK, here's a random Mime. rELEASE THE mIME!

And now its time to play...
Anagrams of the day: (created with names spelled with individual scrabble tiles, shaking them up in a Yahtzee cup and spilling them on my vibrating electronic football game until the hidden message appears...)

INPUT: "RELEASE THE MEMO"

OUTPUT
1. - "MALE HEROES MEET" and the similar "HERO TEAMS MELEE".
*HEROES, as in Nunes, Gowdy, the president, and all other individuals who have a hand in fighting this corruption. *MELEE, as in a confused fight, skirmish, or scuffle. That would be the democrats and their alphabet media partners in crime.

2. - MOLE MEET HEARSE
*MOLE, as in the espionage definition, and any and all of the corrupt individuals and holdovers from the obama admin who tried to throw the election to Hilery (sic). *HEARSE, as in a vehicle for conveying the coffin at a funeral.

Listen, and understand. That memo mime is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.

THE END