Saturday, March 22, 2008

Peter Hussein CottonTail

The Easter bunny used to scare the bejesus out of me when I was a kid. Not the dude in the obvious cheap mall costume, but the REAL Easter bunny. You know... Peter Cottontail. Remember the song?

Here comes Peter CottonTail
Hoppin' down the bunny trail
hippity hoppity
Easter's on its way

Santa Claus never scared me this way. St. Nick may be an elf, but he always reminded me of a kindly and gentle grandpa who brought me presents and candy once per year. The Easter bunny on the other hand, is this humungous beast covered in fur, with razor sharp teeth, whose sole mission is to HIDE the freakin' eggs I worked my a$$ off coloring!

On Christmas eve, all tucked and snug in bed, I would fall asleep with visions of sugar plums dancing in my head. On Easter eve, I would lay awake terrified, straining to hear any sign of the giant rodent with it's rodent brain thinking alien rodent thoughts. Would it stick to the script again this year by hiding the eggs, leaving some candy, and move on? Or would the creature twitch it's nose outside my bedroom door and decide to deviate from the schedule? No? Maybe it was just me then.

Jeremiah Wright's Easter message

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