Thursday, March 28, 2013

Sonia Sotomayor sells sea shells by the seashore, Part II

Associate Justice Sonia Sotomayor continues to make her oral arguments before the court in nothing but tongue twisters, frustrating the other justices on the bench and opening up wild speculation as to her actual stances on each case.

It's why she is called the wise Latina. Nobody actually understands what she is trying to say, so they assume it to be a profundity lest they be judged a racist.

In the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) currently before the court, Associate Sotomayer was asked to weigh in on the legitimacy of a federal provision that prevents married gay couples from receiving a range of federal benefits.

Said Sonia, "If Stu chews shoes, should Stu choose the shoes he chews?"

Everyone nodded in agreement, sure that she must be on to something.

"What about the provision in DOMA that defines marriage as between a man and a woman?", she was asked.

SONIA: "Can a clam cram in a clean cream can? Did Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers or canned clams? What about Willy's real rear wheel?"

Meanwhile, Justice Elena Kagan stared silently into space and drool running down one cheek.

We will have to wait until June to see what this collection of powerful minds have come up with, and how creative  or clumsy they are in their continuing mission in ripping up the Constitution and furthering the progressive agenda.

SONIA: "DOMA Arigato, Mr. Roboto. DOMA?"

Indeed, Associate Sotomayor.... Indeed.

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