Monday, March 4, 2013

Marriage is not like golf, but will Elin still give Tiger Woods a mulligan?

Hollywood Marriages and golf are nothing alike. One is a holy and divine covenant where there is love and commitment, trust and obedience to God's will. The other is a union between like-minded high profile celebrities, usually lasting the weekend.

Today's fake quote:
So Tiger, are you two back together?
TW: "Not so fast. This is just a trial reconciliation with my $110 million, errr.... I mean my Elin and the children."

In golf, a mulligan is a term used for when a player gets a "Do-Over" after an errant shot, allowing them to try again from the same spot of the wild swing without penalty.

RULES for cheating (Hey, even cheaters should have standards!)
Of course, mulligans are against the rules of professional play, but weekend hacks like myself have used it sparringly to our advantage. We would usually limit them to the very first tee, and ONLY after everyone had hit into the strange. If even just one player out of four crushed his drive and split the fairway, there would be no motivation for that player to agree to let the others hit again. Thankfully, the caliber of players with whom I golf has qualified me for a mulligan or two on more than a few occasions.

So a strict interpretation of my standards for the use of a mulligan above (as it relates to Tiger and Elin's situation) would mean that they both would have had to sleep with someone else on their wedding night (first tee). As far as I know, this may not have been the case and it was just Tiger dropping extra balls surreptitiously down his pant leg all over the course.

HANDICAPPING the players before the round
A player's handicap is intended to show a player's potential and to allow for all skill levels to compete on an equitable basis. eg: "I'll play you for $10 Bucks, but you've got to spot me 2 strokes."

Tiger (reportedly worth $600 million) and Elin are apparently in RELATIONSHIP HANDICAPPING negotiations before they decide to tee it up again. Tiger offered a $200 million no-cheating prenuptial agreement and Elin countered with a demand that he cough up $350 million.

Meanwhile, Tiger may be playing a few practice rounds with Olympic skier Lindsey Vonn.

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