Sunday, March 8, 2015

Bloody Sunday - Obama forgets to spring forward and misses Golf Tee Time

SELMA, Ala - The day after President Obama delivered an incoherent speech commemorating the 50th anniversary of the famous civil rights march, Obama causes his own "Bloody Sunday" at the Selma Golf and Country Club.

"It all started when the president did his 'jog-pimp' up to the first tee box already occupied by 4 club members getting ready to tee off," said the group's pimple-faced teenage golf caddy. 

"The president yells 'HANDS UP, DON'T SHOOT!' and 'I'M THE SLAVE WHO BUILT THE WHITE HOUSE!'  just as Bob was completing his swing and causing his drive to hook through the clubhouse picture window."

Apparently, the president's confusion was a result of Daylight Savings Time, and his forgetting to set his clock ahead one hour. When reminded of the time change, obama held up a mini golf pencil and his phone, and issued an Executive Order delaying Daylight Savings Time for the Selma Country Club grounds until after his golf round was completed. He then got on his phone with the DOJ and ordered that corruption charges be filed against all four white golfers at the first tee box.

Bloody Sunday indeed!

Startling new evidence connects Obama's roots to Polynesian Fruit Punch!
I don't know about you, but With the economy in shambles, the unemployment rate over 8% (even with funny math) and With over $5 trillion dollars in new Obama debt - I take great comfort in the knowledge that... SOMEHOW, SOMEWHERE, a team of genealogists working tirelessly around the clock may FINALLY show Obama indeed has slave blood. We're saved!

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