Wednesday, September 30, 2009

I'm Cuckoo for Nutro Max!

Meet Archie, a previously pampered miniature schnauzer who is feeling the pinch from the recession. According to this story on booming pet-food sales, there hasn't been any canine culinary cut-backs in Archie's home. His owner's might be unemployed and subsequently buried in credit-card debt, on the verge of a home foreclosure and down to eating macaroni and cheese, but Archie is still getting his customary three squares a day.

"...retail sales of pet food are up 4.5 percent in 2009 at about $18 billion. Future pet-food sales are projected to top $21 billion by 2013."

So how is poor Archie feeling the pinch, you ask? He has had to wait a little longer between clippings. His pathetic and neglectful owners have admitted under questioning that they have even skipped the usual Archie treat here and there. HORRORS!

I am concerned for Archie and the stress this poor pooch must be under. Stress is a killer, and there certainly is plenty of things for Archie to be stressed about!

Obama's stimulus spending spree is in the process of causing economic collapse while war rages in Afghanistan. General McChrystal has made an emergency request for more troops, but Obama chooses instead to travel to Copenhagen and pimp for a 2016 Chicago Olympics. Our weak-kneed American president is inviting future conflict all over the globe, as more and more Americans are losing their jobs, their homes, and their futures because of his policies.

But Archie doesn't have a clue or a care in the world about all that. No, Archie is in danger from stress-related health issues every day he has to wonder why he isn't getting a steady stream of "foofy" toys and tasty treats. Suffer the poochies! For the love and praise of Barack, I ask you - Is this still Amerika?

So in conclusion, human discretionary income down; pet-food sales up. I admit to being a guilty party to this equation. My lab Ally is well fed.

On an unrelated subject, did you know that Nutro Max dog food are chock full of Glucosamine and Chondroitin? I don't know what those thingys are, but maybe they add to the Cocoa Puffs flavoring.


  1. This left me scratching my head. You'd think that during times of economic stress, sales of pet items would go down, not up. What gives?

    At our house, we draw the line at organ transplants for Fluffy.