The front row of an Obama press conference I'd like to see...
PRESIDENT OBAMA: I raise my mighty and powerful finger and call on... Eeny meeny miny mo... the propeller head computer geek in front.
BILL GATES: Thank you Mr. President. *opens jar and Unleashes a Swarm of Mosquitoes* "Malaria is spread by mosquitoes. I brought some. Here I'll let them roam around. There is no reason only poor people should be infected."
PRESIDENT OBAMA: Thank you Mister Gates. *swat* I may have room in my administration for talent like yours. *swat* Let's see, who's next? How about the batman dude there.
CHRISTIAN BALE: "...KICK YOUR F---ing @--! I want you off this set you pr---! No, don't just be sorry, THINK FOR ONE F---ing SECOND!! WHAT THE F--- ARE YOU DOING! Are you professional or not? You want me to go trash your lights? YOU WANT ME TO TRASH YOUR F---ing LIGHTS?
PRESIDENT OBAMA: Please put my teleprompter down Mr. Bale, I am lost without it. On a side note, I believe you and my VP would get along great. Uhhhh... Jack Bauer, what do you have to say to me?
JACK: GET DOWN!... Sorry Mister President. I thought I saw a mosquito.
PRESIDENT OBAMA: My inaugural moment. I'm excited. Helen fossil, err Thomas, what's your question?
HELEN THOMAS: "Mr. President, do you think that Pakistanis are maintaining the safe haven in Afghanistan for these so-called terrorist, and also do you know of any place in the Middle East that has nuclear weapons?"
One out of four wingnuts ain't bad!
Florida Zombie Alert - Florida City Warns Residents Of Power Outage, Zombies Here's the actual alert: Somebody has a sense of humor... [nervous laughter]
11 hours ago